PEOPLE: KEEP YOUR SHIRTS ON IN WINTER!

Attention all Northeast residents: I know this mild winter weather may have some of you starting to think a little irrationally. But PLEASE, do not flock to the beaches in your Speed-O's and Thongs due to seasonal-anamoly-induced insanity. Spare the innocent victims the emotional scarring this will cause (see photo!)
Please, please, just stick with football games, chicken wings, and beer..INSIDE the confines of your homes or "sports" lairs in basements. If you do have to travel outside, please be sure to cover your legs AND torso with as much clothing as possible!
This has been a public service announcement from "Friends for a Better America" (body-mass subdivision office, Bedeukia, AL)

Come on people, it's JANUARY, hide the buddhas!!